wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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