Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
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i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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