Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
4 words: hood of his car
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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