So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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