I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
