I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
