There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
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