Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
