put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
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