K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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