I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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