And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Randomize
