the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
