is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
