I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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