i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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