I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
