do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Randomize
