he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
