john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
PANTIES FOUND
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