i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
