Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
