every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
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and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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