Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
