haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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