Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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