I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
