u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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