belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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