very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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