Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
