I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
