i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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