Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
i black out too much to be "responsible"