If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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