they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Randomize