Your mouth is God's brothel.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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