that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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