Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a trapeze. enough said
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Randomize