I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
