he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
