Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
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