dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
