Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Randomize
