Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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