someone get that fucking seahorse.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
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I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
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You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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