No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
