Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i think i have herpe
just one?
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Randomize