He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
