Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
