we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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