I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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